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I’m pretty much doing a happy dance and smiling like the Chesire Cat in Alice and Wonderland. I am officially halfway to my goal of 50,000 words as of today. I wrote up 3,334 words this morning! I am not sure what to expect once the 50,000 words are written. I don’t know if Jonathan’s tale will be told by then. Probably not. I’m averaging around 7,000 to 8,000 words per chapter and I’ve just finished Chapter Four’s rough draft. I may end up getting rid of the chapters themselves and just put dividers in between the scene changes that are currently chapter splits. I’ve got a lot more to go. 50,000 is just a scratch. Not even a dent if I’m going to be honest. But it feels good being this close and this far into it. My issue right now is I’ve not really read any of the four chapters so I don’t know if it’s all cohesive. So that will have to wait until I’m done with the entire rough and take a break to read it before sitting down to edit. I’m nervous, anxious and even a whole lot terrified.

I’ve been asking myself a lot of questions. Am I writing a complete story? Is what I’m writing making sense? Is there enough conflicts and emotions? Is my MC being portrayed the way he needs to be or is he being too soft? Or too emotional? Am I leaving out too much of the five senses? Am I too close to my story that I’m not seeing it actually being crap? Is it crap? Am I waisting my time and move on to something else? The questions are endless and I’m not coming up with any answers. I guess once I get the draft read and edited I’ll send it off to a couple of beta readers and see what happens. I imagine if it comes back with encouragement on the side of suggested changes and criticism I’ll be doing whole lot more editing and re-writes. I wont give it up. I might put it on the shelf and forget about it for a while but Passion’s Haunting will end up being finished and polished.

Among the anxiety and the sweat I’m mixing with the tears I think the excitement of writing so much in just this small amount of time is overwhelming. I don’t see too many people jumping up and down about getting out just under 30,000 words even on a rough draft. But I am. I guess I’m just so new at writing something more than a couple thousand words or so that I can’t contain myself. Anyways I guess this post is done and I’m off to occupy myself with some much needed rest of the imagination.

How is your WIP coming along? Are you doing Camp NaNoWrimo too or going it on your own?